I'm sorry, I lied

You know the popular Redemption Song by Bob Marley that talks about freeing yourself of mental slavery.

Well, in my case, I had to free myself of mental gymnastics. Even after writing a great issue on vulnerability and sharing, I still managed to paint myself in a corner by thinking I always had to show up, no matter what.

So, I did a whole thing about coming back after losing my dad, said I was ready to serve you, my subscribers, implying that I was in the right headspace to offer you premium content.

But that's not true. I lied, and I am sorry about that. I thought I could keep it pushing, act like I hadn't just had one of the most significant losses of my adult life. So, I showed up inconsistently, trying my best to live up to the promise of being in your mailboxes twice a week but I couldn't.

I wasn't okay and needed more time than I thought I did. I had put myself under immense pressure to go back to living like everything was fine but my head, mind hadn't received the memo, and so, it fought back, telling me, 'no, Inem we need some time to start the healing process.'

Eventually, I listened and did just that- cry over this intense loss, laugh about the good times and start the healing process. So, here I am saying, I am sorry I lied. I should have been more honest. I hope you forgive me.

I want to encourage you to free yourself of undue pressure too. Don't be like me and wait to have a physical or mental breakdown. Instead, take the time now to take care of yourself.

Show up when you are can and make sure you show up well but when you can't, understand that it's okay to cry, fall sometimes, make you get back again and keep it moving.

As usual, feel free to reply to this mail and/or drop a comment.

I am rooting for you,

Inem.

P.S: I will back on Thursday, October 8, 2020, by 12 pm sitting pretty in your email box.